when i was lying in bed yesterday,
suddenly all the SA memories came flooding back.
all the beautiful memories.
sigh.
i miss him.


:: you ::
i knew u got what u wanted.
so i wished u all the best.
but..
u said nothing at all.
not even a word of thanks.
unless..
singtel screwed up on me again.
and never delivered my wishes for u.
that i got nth to say.
up till today i still dont know why.
`broken.

[editted]
on the other hand,
maybe i shld have confidence in myself,
that i can excel in the SA environment.
but..
if i went back,
i wld have never known what i could achieve.
i never knew i could be a sports person.
though i'm not really good.
i never knew i could get an A for 2.4km.
i never knew i could have that determination to push myself on no matter how bleak things looked.
and for this simple reason i shant give up.
why shld i embark on a journey and give up when i'm 3/4 thru it already?
i would have never known who are my true friends,
the ones who are willing to be by my side and always lend me a listening ear.
i really thank you peeps for being there for me :D
i would have never known how life is like to venture alone out there.
i would have never known how it is like to come out of that nice sheltered environment where i have ppl to guide me along.
it's me and only me to fight on.
it's time for independance.
it's lonliness.
but.
there are many sides to any situation.
it really depends on how u look at it.
loneliness may not mean a bad thing at times.

life has its own arrangements for us.
it's up to us to walk it out (:

ok let me side track a lil.
heh heh.
it's not only me who cant stand my mom!!
hahaha.
the designers too!
they are like giving her the BTH FACE.
LOL.