x. sigh

well.i fell sick on wed afternoon.and my fever shoot all the way up to 39.2.new record =x pulled myself out of bed and went out with mom at arnd 9.30pm to get a doc cos was really worried that the fever wld damage my brain or sth but wth all the clinics closed down on me.grrr.so i skipped sch on thurs cos i still had a slight fever and was rather weak.and thurs was the day with three tests in a row + hockey match vs jj.but wells.i needed to rest.
-fast forward to friday-
pe in da morning.submitted my mc to mr jeffery tan.then he was like what happened to u?overexhausted ah? slacked arnd for the whole pe lesson and -fast forward-.schoold finally ended at 12.30.but mr chua suddenly popped a maths re test on me.i was like WHAT THE!u give me such a SHORT notice!!so i requested for the 1.30 slot saying i want to revise a lil.but still in the end i had no time to cos i was like shuttling arnd the whole sch looking for teachers to give them my mc and stuffs.

after much phone calls and him calling out for me on the fourth floor and me not knowing where his voice came from being at the first floor,*those who know me shld know the BLUR look on my face then* LOL.
i fianlly manage to locate him and climed all the way up to take the test.and he offered me the best seat in the class man.right in front of everyone.his seat.yups.the teachers' table and the teachers' chair.and the stupid chair cldnt get down.was at its highest level.i tried to get it down and cldnt then mr chua help me and still he cldnt do it too.it was stuck.so for the rest of the test i was like bending till my neck hurts a lil.
hmm.. i dunno.i know how to do some questions but overall if i'm lucky i'll just pass but if i'm unlucky i'll fail by like a few marks.
and after the test i chiong down to ccab to watch the guys match.took 190 changed 156 and as usual i missed a stop.a freaking far stop. and walked all the way back from that stop to smu there.was complaining away to jin that he din describe the place properly for me and made me walk a stop.he was like -aiya a stop only wat- the guys thrashed yj 5-0! wooohhooo~ WELL DONE!good one =) so i stayed arnd and chatted with shah they all la.wa they are meanies k.bastard me like siao.to the extent that i sit down there want to cry loh.GRR.kind of worried bout shah.he's overexhausted loh.and he cant afford to fall sick like me.cos the team needs him.so we took a bus from the smu stop and in the end jin was like - ok that was really a long dist u walked - haha.i dun complain for nutting k.
then i went off to join zihao tong and meiyi.it's been long since we mast sat tog and talked.but still..i could feel that the atm wasnt right.like..well.i guess everyone wasnt in the right mood bahs.then zh went home.
and the 3 of us went to je to talked and started thrashing everything out.it was sad.i tot i was the only one.turns out tong too.when we were talking bout him i could feel tong's tears and mine.but both of us held back.
[for you ]maybe for me i did make some mistakes along the way,mistakes which i'm unaware of.cos i'm rather sotong at times..but u cld jolly well tell me in the face i dont mind. but why just walk out like that w/o saying anything?it hurts a lot u noe that.u mean so much to me..and i really really really do treasure you.all the memories are still flashing across my already bombarded mind.my migrain is killing me. but no way am i running away from this.it's been a month..since we last talked.i miss all the phone calls all the laughters and evverything..everything that we used to do tog. -sob- i still rmb that time i was crying on the phone and u listening to me and trying to comfort me and telling me " i'll always be there for u " but look at things now. i've not changed you noe.i'm still there.still willing to be there.though i chose a different route.but that doesnt mean anything.it doesnt mean that i'll forget u.no way..cos u mean too much to me. -sob- i miss the good ol days so much.
meiyi is totally stressed out too.and i can actualli feel for her.cos i can say that i'm in a situation sorta similiar to her.but wells for her case she cant choose to ignore her parents like i do.yes.ppl look at her with awe.wow.HCI.but do they actualli noe the hard work and everyting she puts in?she said something which really made me want to cry.- if i get knocked down by a car the next day what is the use of all the As?sometimes i just wanna give up but i cant - really.i think this society is too poisoned.too cold.but.. welcome to reality.
i rmb leon getting teary after the sec maths test saying that he'd fail.i was like come on.in life there are more beautiful things out there than results to shed ur tears on.
and so the conversation among us three gers mainly evovled arnd those and some others.even things that happened before and things that made us unhappy with each other.we thrashed it all out.i'm really really happy that we're able to do that.it doesnt matter if our characters dun really click.it doesnt matter that we dun see eye to eye all the time.it's the effort at the end of the day that keeps the friendship going.as long as u care,as long as u put in effort,as long as i can feel it.i promise to be there for u.and walk with u till the end.but not physically though.that's impossible.cos we all haf our lives our own stuffs and everything..but mentally i'll be there for u.
took 105 home and met a senior on the way home.chatted with her.laffed a lil and i realised we both still dunno each other's names.lol.got home and tong told me some things which kind of shocked me.but still i refuse to believe he's such a person.i just refuse to.
it's been a long day..